PSLE (Primary School Leaving Examination)
by Jennifer Jolie
Summary: An entire musical (well, not all of it yet) on the perils of PSLE - the horrors of studying and tearing your hair out over your results. Those who know me might *just* find a reference. Will make changes to cast.
1. Cast

**Jennifer, "Nez"** – The character we follow. Heavily based on me, heh. Well, so are the rest of 'em (I mean, they're based on others!

**Gia, "G"** – Takes life moderately well. 

**Pauline, "Fo"** – Takes life easier than the rest of us. Still does reasonably well. Speaks Elvish and F language fluently.

**Eve, "Evil"** – A _real_ worrier, she worries about everything. She can be very annoying. She adds the schizophrenic to 6I.

**Josie, "Owl"** – A potential worrier. Studies very hard. Wise as an owl. Makes life better for the rest of us.

**Martha, "Mar"** – The world's most brilliant student.

**May-Kim, "MK"** – The class troublemaker, swearer, player and all that all in one.

**Lybya, "L-ya"** – Part one of the Fun Gang. Constantly giggling or cheering people up. How nice.

**Sylvya, "S-ya"** – Part two of the Fun Gang. Crazy over dogs.


	2. Act one

Act One

Eve: Hi!

Pauline: Morning!

Eve: Hey, what day is it today?

Pauline: 1st August, why?

Eve: Omigod. Oh my god.

Pauline: What?  
Eve: Prelims!

Pauline: Next month lah you idiot!

Eve: NEXT MONTH? AAGH! ONE MONTH ONLY?

30 days (the tune has been thought of but not scored)

(musical intro, has not been thought of)

Pauline: You've got thirty days

               And one-oh-one ways

               You can cram, you can scam, you can squeeze in all the nooks

               And you got seven-twenty hours to the start of the prelims

               But ain't that when most hit the books?

Eve: I've got five subjects

        And one-oh-one texts

        I could sail, I could fail, and you still can stand and smile?  
        And all of my revision isn't counting on the homework

        And that's bound to arrive by the pile!

Pauline: You've got the brains

              I've built castles in Spain

              But I pass, and I last, and I even hit the baseline

              And we've made it so far, and we're still not schizophrenic

              So stop worrying that beautiful mind!

Eve: But hey, A-star strays

        And so do A's

        Gonna cry, want to die, in my dreams a big F beckons!

        Forty-three two hundred minutes, now do you want the seconds?

        Then two-five-nine-two-oh-oh-oh!!!!!!

Pauline: There you go, you're Math's already better.

Eve: Oh shut up.

(end of music)

End of Act One 


	3. Act three

Act Three

(Gia's house. Gia sits at table doing her homework, swearing.)

HDB (tune only half done, not scored)

Gia:

        Down on the ground you're just waiting for class   

        And some fat Ah Po's got a bug up her ass

        And there's a couple up there that should get a divorce

        I can hear them every bloody two floors!

        I've got Chinese in the left ear and Math in the right

       And some idiot on the phone chatting all night

       Add some grandmothers next door watching T.V.

       And voila! You've got an HDB!

(flashback)

Madam Azizah: The Housing Development Board was set up by the PAP in 1960.

(class yawns obviously)

Madam Azizah: Its aims were to provide cheap, quality housing to all the residents of Singapore.

Gia:

        I've got so much to do, but I can't concentrate

        My mum's on the comp, so I'll (slower) sit….. here…… and……….. wait

        I think my new neighbors are strangling their cat

        Tada! That's an HDB-

(music abruptly stops and noise pours in from outside)

All: GOAL!!!

(Gia curses and throws something out the window, an exclamation can be heard)

Gia: (spoken) (tour guide voice) And that, ladies and gentlemen, is called "Killer Litter".

(music resumes)

Gia: So much to do and so much to see

        In Singapore's PAP's nice HDB!

        A couple of things out the window – that's that

        Haha! That's an HDB flat!

(end of music)

End of Act Three 


End file.
